Lately when I get on Facebook, I’ve encountered articles
that carry the tone of “Why I Hate Facebook… and other rants”. Okay, that
wasn’t the title of the article(s), but you catch my drift. The authors
maintain that we’re broken into types, that we’re all guilty of bragging, and
that Facebook gives a false impression of our daily life or just the best
versions of ourselves. I have a friend who maintains that Facebook is designed
to make you sad. All of the parties you aren’t attending, the weddings you weren’t
invited to, and the friends that you no longer keep in touch with can all be
boiled down to a newsfeed.
Interesting.
Don’t get me wrong; there have been many times where I have
practiced my break up speech with Facebook. “It’s totally you and not me.” “We
obviously want different things out of this.” “You’ve changed since 2004.”… But
really, just like any bad romance, if I choose to stay, I really have no one to
blame but myself. So, like many people, I just cringe in silence when I see
memes about Walmart or celebrity fodder, because this is the “price of
admission” to stay on an (ironically) free social media site.
But for all of the things that Facebook does not do well
(and I’m sure you have counted them on your fingers and toes), there actually
are some things that I do enjoy about it, and if I’m being perfectly honest
with myself, many things that I enjoy sharing with people in my social network.
So here’s what I think Facebook does well:
1.)
Facebook
actually does allow me to be proud/happy/excited for people I know who are
doing well. For every person you know who treats Facebook like his or her
diary and is constantly complaining there are ten people who are excited about
something today.
I know we’re adults, and maybe shouldn’t
need affirmation on such a grand level, but when I see that someone has gotten
married, had a baby when they never thought they would be able to, passed the
bar exam, or took an amazing trip that they worked their whole life to take, my
initial reaction is, “HELL YES. Absolutely. Take your happiness and run with
it.” Because network friends, this life is long, and besides the joy that you
are experiencing in your life (and I am well aware you need no validation) I
hope you know that there are people rooting for you, even if you don’t know or
need it. And I for one wish you well upon your journey.
2.)
Facebook
reminds me every now and then that I know some smart people… really, really
smart people. Okay, I hate the memes about Walmart as much as the next
person, and honestly, I could do without a poignant take on Taylor Swift’s song
lyrics, but filtered through all of that, there are some really bright people
that I have met in this life. Some of these people are professional writers,
comedy teams, producers, doctors, musicians, and just all around interesting
people, and I actually know them. How did I get so lucky? When I read about
their latest projects (that they choose to share on social media), I am blown
away by the ideas and insight that they are putting into the world. These
people teach me plenty when I take the time to notice their creativity and
appreciate their stamina for the rejection and beat down that life can offer at
times… they’re inspiring. Whether they know it or not really isn’t the point;
the point is that they are putting themselves out there and taking a risk. The
success of it all is not for me or anyone else to measure.
3.)
Facebook
illustrates that some people have really changed for the better. I’m not
just talking about on the outside, although some of you have really blossomed
into lovely adults. That person that we weren’t sure would graduate college and
spent most of 2005 on a video game in the sweatpants, or the really pompous
jerk who became humbled later in life, well, they grew into decent people. And
change looks different for everyone. Some people made subtle shifts, and some
hit rock bottom before they got their life together. Again, it doesn’t really
matter than I notice it, or that anyone else does, but since I have, I rather
enjoy rooting for these people now. I enjoy success stories and I realize that
they come in many different packages.
I know that people can make their
lives much more interesting on Facebook than in reality. I know that maybe it
isn’t necessary to see ALL 108 pictures of your trip to Vegas this year
(anywhere but Vegas, please, I beg you). I also know that it creates a really
false sense of knowing people you really do not know. (Shameful plug: You
should know that Facebook has taught me how to be a one-lined comedian and I
can assure you that I am not nearly as funny in real life.)…
But for the people I spent twelve
years in primary and secondary education with, for the people I lived with in
college, stood in your weddings, met your children, and have sat at a table
with, I tell you with absolute certainty that I do actually celebrate your
victories and success, filtered through the clips of Toddlers and Tiaras and
random invitations to parties 1800 miles away.
And if ever you or I reach our
threshold for negativity, judgment, or jealousy; if you or I ever decide that
we are no longer sifting through our newsfeed to celebrate our friends’
success, we need only to remember that at any time we can in fact, turn it off.
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